I Know My Fate!

For many years now, I have seen what my fate is to be coming clearer and clearer before my eyes. I did not want to accept it. I knew what it was supposed to be and yet I resisted.

I cannot point to any given thing that has emphatically told me in precise words that this is my fate. Yet it seems to me that God has always spoken to me through many outlets such as His Word, Pastors, Evangelists, other Christians, Non-Christians, even animals and the very things that make up Nature! They have all pointed to me and told me what my fate will be. And yet still I resisted.

So I lived the life of a sinner. A Liar, Adulterer, Blasphemer, Drug Dealer, Thief, Slanderer and many, many other sinful things was I. Those of you that know me, know some of those things about me. Those of you who do not know me, you are more than welcome to go through my blogs on here and find out what you may.

I bet many of you are curious as to what that fate actually is. Well, I'll tell you. My fate, as I know it to be, is to give my very life for Jesus Christ! I'm not talking about living it to Jesus. I'm talking about standing up against all that is against Jesus and speaking the Truth about Jesus, not giving a single inch in my stand, and having my life taken because of it! The life in this very body extinguished! I know this to be a fact that will happen. Again, I cannot point to any one thing that has told me this, but I know it to be a fact none the less. I take it on faith. The faith I have in God, in Jesus, in the Word of God to accomplish that which I have been told is to come.

I surrender to my fate completely! I surrender myself and the very breath of my life to this fate knowing that God's Will will be furthered along with my last breath! I surrender it into your hands my Lord and Savior, into your hands Jesus Christ, into your hands Lord God Almighty!

I know that I may not die tonight. I know that I may not die tomorrow. I know it may not happen next month or next year. I simply know it will happen. But then, it has already happened in one sense as well. The sense that I had to die to all that I desire in my life in order to accept all that God wants for me in my life.

I had to come to realize that my life was nothing but vanity. I had good looks once. I had a fit body also. I had brains. I had a good job. I had a loving wife. I had great friends. Then God showed my the truth about my life. He let me ruin myself in order to show me that my life was nothing but vanity and even that which I did have, I could lose through my vanity. I lost my good looks. I lost my fit body. I even lost my ability to think clearly. I was without a job. My wife divorced me. My friends no longer talked to me. I had even lost my will to live. I truthfully did not think of any reason to go on living. The thing is, the more I thought about what I had lost, the harder I tried to find just one reason to live. I failed in that quest!

God was with me even then as well. He had never left me. I just had turned away from Him and was ignoring His attempts to get me to turn around and see Him once again. I came to the end of myself. When I mean the end, I mean there was nothing left of me. All that I had valued and cherished that I had accomplished through all my efforts was gone. I no longer had any reason to go on living.

I prayed that I would die! It hurts me even now to admit that. But I prayed and prayed and prayed that God would snuff out my life so that I would not feel the pain of all that loss any more. He heard me. He heard what I was praying for and He answered me. He took my life. I willingly surrendered it to Him. Then He said, 'Not yet!' and He started to transform me. He restored my intellect. He restored my friends. He restored my faith in Him. He took this ruined husk of a shell and He poured Himself into it and started transforming me into an image of His Son, Jesus Christ. I am far from complete. But He is still pouring Himself into me. He keeps pouring and pouring and pouring.

As I now live His life, not mine anymore but His, I find that all those things that I thought I had accomplished of my own will, they were never mine to begin with, but His! And now He is putting them back into my stewardship and guiding me on how to care for them. I can't tell you how much He has restored to me. My life has meaning again. But then, it's not my life anymore, but His!

The Jay that all of you knew from before is dead! The Jay that lives now is not the former Jay, but instead, Jay is the Jay that Jesus has made. This new Jay lives for the sole purpose of doing the Will of Jesus Christ. And the best part of all you ask? The best part is that my life is better than it ever has been before! I cannot tell you of the joy and peace and everything that comes from Him.

I wish for each and every one of you to know Him like I know Him! Do you live for yourself? Do you live for someone else other than Jesus? If you do, then stop and die because the life you are living is dead anyway. Go talk to Jesus! Right here. Right now. Ask my Lord to be your Lord. He will never leave you. He will never forsake you. And all those people who you were formerly living for, they will be better off with you having Jesus Christ as your Lord and them being second in your life instead of first. They will know joy and peace like never before.

Yet I still know that the death of this body is to come. I even know that this body will die in defiance against something that will be assailing me for the sole reason that I have Jesus Christ as my Lord. When that will be I do not care. I do not care if it happens tonight. I do not care if it happens thirty years from now. The only thing I do care about is that I give it willingly for Jesus!

May my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, reach out and touch your heart this very moment and let you know that He loves you!

Amen and Amen!