Hello Guys and Gals,
This is a hard post to write so if you have heard some of this before, please bear with me!
I know some of you have heard this before. But since I have just had it refreshed in my mind due to having to go to the ER and tell of it 5-6 times, I am going to remind everyone of what it is I am currently defying the odds with.
When I got diagnosed with my condition, Cervical Neuralgia, I had a 5% chance of living past 6 months. Of that 5%, I then had a 99% chance of dying from the pain within the first 3 years. And the pain diagnostician from Mayo Clinic that diagnosed me knew of nobody who had ever lived past 5 years with it.
It has now been over 4 1/2 years now and if I go 6 more months with this, I will the the first ever person known to have done so!
Now I know that many people out there believe that my pain is not as great as I declare it to be. Yet, I just had an ER doctor reassure me that very minute few people ever experience the kind of pain that I have.
So with this change in the law regarding Vikodin, the only real pain killer I can take outside of a hospital, I have been without it for over 2 weeks now. Add to that, the Rx prescribed was signed by a nurse practicioner and not by the doctor, which before was acceptable, but now is not. Essentially, I was informed that I had to see a doctor here in order to get an acceptable Rx. So that was the whole reason I went to the ER tonight.
Now add to all of those, I have a rare kidney disease called IgA Nephropathy which is one of the reasons I have chronic kidney stones every six months or so. My current kidney stone I have had for over 2 years which is getting larger and larger and keeps shifting around on me. So I have kidney spasms more than most simply because I have a mexican jumping bean kidney stone. One of my doctors did not believe me when I stated that the kidney stone was causing spasms while we were talking because I wasn't screaming. He put his hand on my back and found me to be telling the truth because he felt the kidney spasming.
On top of that, I am an insulin resistant diabetic. I have diabetic neuropathy in both feet and both hands to some degree. I have also had a gastric bypass, the full blown surgery, which limits my already slim diet down to next to nothing.
And all of that is just for starters. I have prayed to God for death more times than I can count. I beg and beg and beg Him to take me home. He tells me that He has work for me yet to do!
And for those that do not know it, I hear His voice in my soul all the time. I have full conversations with Him guiding me in how I perceive the world. And yes, I still sin every single day! This is why I constantly tell people of His goodness and His hope that only He can give!
When I went to a seminar out in Colorado last year to see Pastor Eric Ludy speak, I had been listening to Him speak for around 4 months with a sermon lasting around an hour or two every day. I felt like he was telling me all the things about God that I had been telling others for years now and this was the FIRST time I ever heard a pastor actually speaking of the power and hope that Jesus Christ brings to one's life! Eric, if you ever have the chance to read this, let me say thank you from the bottom of my heart!
But in getting to meet him, I asked him why did I have to have such great pain. He told me that he didn't have an answer for that and only God has that answer. But he did say to me that with great pain, and believe me, he saw me in it that week-end with all the storms moving through there, he said with great pain, comes a great opportunity to show the world the great grace that Jesus Christ has granted to me. That is why I continue to speak of it!
Please, anyone who thinks I am being arrogant, let me just simply say that I am trying my best not to sound that way.
We are coming up on the End Times spoken about in all the prophets and in Revelation. Shoot, I think we are already in the middle of the 7 scroll judgments right now. Next comes the 7 trumpet judgments, followed by the 7 bowl judgments. Now for those who believe in Pre-Tribulation Rapture, let me just remind you of what Paul the Apostle said in 1 Corinthians 15:51-55, where it states:
51 But let me reveal to you a wonderful secret. We will not all die, but we will all be transformed! 52 It will happen in a moment, in the blink of an eye, when the last trumpet is blown. For when the trumpet sounds, those who have died will be raised to live forever. And we who are living will also be transformed. 53 For our dying bodies must be transformed into bodies that will never die; our mortal bodies must be transformed into immortal bodies.54 Then, when our dying bodies have been transformed into bodies that will never die, this Scripture will be fulfilled: “Death is swallowed up in victory. 55 O death, where is your victory? O death, where is your sting?” ~ New Living Translation
I believe the last trumpet Paul is talking about here is the last of the 7 trumpet judgments. Revelation 11:15-19 speaks of the last trumpet saying,
15 Then the seventh angel blew his trumpet, and there were loud voices shouting in heaven:
“The world has now become the Kingdom of our Lord and of his Christ,
and he will reign forever and ever.”
16 The twenty-four elders sitting on their thrones before God fell with their faces to the ground and worshiped him. 17 And they said,
“We give thanks to you, Lord God, the Almighty,
the one who is and who always was,
for now you have assumed your great power
and have begun to reign.
18 The nations were filled with wrath,
but now the time of your wrath has come.
It is time to judge the dead
and reward your servants the prophets,
as well as your holy people,
and all who fear your name,
from the least to the greatest.
It is time to destroy
all who have caused destruction on the earth.”
19 Then, in heaven, the Temple of God was opened and the Ark of his covenant could be seen inside the Temple. Lightning flashed, thunder crashed and roared, and there was an earthquake and a terrible hailstorm. ~ New Living Translation
Now I know that there are many who disagree with me on this, and I am not showing this for any reason other than to witness to you the truth as I know it. I have come to believe that us Christians will be present for all 7 scroll judgments and we will not be caught up to Heaven until the 7th Trumpet judgment. This means that we will be here on Earth, in this mortal realm, with our still mortal bodies, during the first 2/3's of the Tribulation.
Let me also say this: if you are on my friend list on Facebook, then I love you with more of my heart than you truly know! Secondly, I ask you all to share this message around so that more than just you can be witness to it for I am going to show you now the HOPE that I have been filled with and the reason I continue to defy death in spite of all the health reasons in why I should be dead already!
If ever there was a time to purge your life of any sin you have in it, and forgive all of those who have sinned against you and whom you have sinned against, IT IS NOW! I have forgiven, even though it still gets me upset from time to time, I have forgiven any who has done me wrong and ask forgiveness of any who holds a grudge against me. James, my dear brother, I love you with all my heart and I am thankful you and I have reconciled. It means more to me than you know!
Now why do I say all this? It is simple, in Ezekiel 18 it states who will be forgiven and who will not. Let me say that it also put an end to me of the whole statement once saved, always saved! Now that is an ongoing debate between Calvinists and Arminians that basically both sides are refusing to see the truth of it. In a nutshell at the end of Ezekiel 18, it states that if you were a sinner, and repented and were forgiven, but return to sinning, that you will be deserving of death for your sin!
24 However, if righteous people turn from their righteous behavior and start doing sinful things and act like other sinners, should they be allowed to live? No, of course not! All their righteous acts will be forgotten, and they will die for their sins. ~ Ezekiel 18:24 NLT
I'd say that pretty much sums up how a man living a righteous life can become sinful and die for it! But do not misunderstand this. Just because you may sin during a day, does not mean you will lose your salvation. The key would be whether or not you persist in the sin, or persist in going to God and begging His forgiveness. This is what I mean when I say I sin daily. I mean that I fail Him each and every day and I am in a constant relationship with good communication (praying) to stay in a sanctified state of existence with God. In other words, I make the call to tell How my day is or when things are going bad just simply to say, Father, I need your help again!
It is a constant and continually changing thing because God keeps drawing me closer and closer to Him!
I hear His voice because I, with His help of course, have trained myself to listen for it! How do I know it is His voice and not Satan's in my head? Simple: it matches up PERFECTLY with the Word of God that I study, seek, and try to live in on a daily basis!
Do you not know that the Word of God in text is a direct representation of the Word of God (Jesus Christ) in flesh? The more you read your bible and get to know the Word of God in text, the more you will get to know Jesus Christ in the flesh!
That is my Hope: Jesus Christ! He carries me when I can no longer go forward and takes me the next mile! He gives to me the strength to get up out of bed every day and endure this pain for another day! He gives me His grace (strength, power, endurance) to endure when nobody understands what it is that I am living through and then He gives me His grace (love, patience, kindness) to speak to those people who continually misunderstand me and look at me as if I am totally bonkers!
I am writing this to you today to show you that I have overcome those obstacles in my life that Jesus said that I have to endure for just a little while longer. I am writing to you today to show you that no matter what Satan or anyone throws at you, you can have access to the same grace (love, patience, kindness, strength, power, endurance) of Jesus Christ that He gives to any who ask, if they just ask Him for it when they need it!
So yeah, today was a very hard day for me and I know that I have many more hard days ahead of me before He takes me home. Abide in Jesus Christ and He will also abide in you to bring you that crown of glory to be given when the last trumpet blows!
With love to any who reads this,
Sincerely,
Jay Jordan
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